Libra: Compromise, Projections, and Listening
7th House / Cardinal Air / Yang Expression / Ruled by Venus
In Libra we explore the fine art of relating, along with all of its complexities. This socially-focused air sign encompasses the entire labyrinth that is human relations— from friends to enemies, courtship to divorce, and our interactions with everyone we encounter in day to day life.
Symbolized by the scales of justice, the highest expression of Libra desires balance, fairness, and equality. Unfortunately, this ideal is often not reached. Libra and the 7th house can also represent imbalance, a lack of fairness, or unequal dynamics. However it manifests, Libra and the 7th house will highlight our interpersonal relations, our social conditioning, and push us to live more balanced lives.
Important Context: from Leo to Virgo to Libra
To better understand Libra, we need to look back at the archetypes that it follows— Leo and Virgo. There is a narrative forming from Leo to Virgo to Libra that is important context to take note of.
The main purpose of Leo is to evolve our creative self-expression and shamelessly step into the spotlight. This fire sign wants to be seen and take up space. However, the shadow of Leo is to either become exceedingly egocentric and dominant, or on the other hand, to become insecure, shy, and hide from the world.
Virgo follows Leo, with the core intention of purifying ourselves of Leo’s excess or depletion. Virgo is an essential 30-degree opportunity to make changes, adjust our habits, and improve our self esteem, all in an effort to be better prepared to enter into relationship in Libra as an equal and fair partner.
If Virgo was successful in their self-improvement mission, then there is a greater chance that their relationships in Libra will be successful as well. However, if Virgo struggles with ongoing personal imbalances— an inflated ego or deflated self-esteem— then those imbalances will inevitably be carried over into Libra.
No one is perfect, and Virgo’s work is never complete. There will always be subtle and complex imbalances that influence how we behave toward others, and the behaviors that we accept from them.
This is Libra territory. In Libra, we can continue improving and refining ourselves through the mirror of other people, seeing them as our teachers, and as windows into ourselves. Or not. It depends on the individual’s willingness (free will) and level of self-awareness.
The Nuance of Balance
Imagine stepping onto the Libra scales with another person. See how the scales move, how one might sink lower, causing the other to raise higher. How do the weights of our personalities match? Is there more of me, or more of you? What are we each willing to do to support a more equal dynamic?
Often, finding balance requires a lot of subtle nuance. We need to develop the sensitivity to tune into ourselves and other people. Sometimes we need to communicate directly what we need, or directly ask the other person what their needs are. Sometimes we need to just be quiet and read between the lines.
Libra seeks harmony with other people, and in order to do so, will need to make certain compromises and concessions. However if the dynamic is seriously out of balance, Libra can also represent the conflicts and arguments needed to restore order in a relationship.
In short, if we want to find balance with other people, we cannot be human bulldozers. We must be sensitive. However, on the other hand— or on the other side of the scales— we cannot be so nice that we let other people dominate over us, either. Holding the two polarities on each of the scales is a prime example of Libra at work.
Projections
Projection is a keyword associated with the Libra archetype, because of how much this everyday phenomenon influences our relationships.
Projection is the process of displacing our feelings, fears, and desires onto someone or something else. It is often seen as a defense mechanism where we attribute our own unacceptable thoughts and behaviors onto other people, usually because we are unable to accept that those things exist within ourselves. We can also project our wishes or desires onto others, such as projecting romance and perfection onto our partners, because we so deeply want to fall in love.
Are our projections of other people fair? Are we coloring others with our prejudices, hopes, or fears? Are we seeing the other person for who they really are, or just for who we want them to be?
How can we suspend our projections of other people and start to see them for who they really are? Many times, the people who we are triggered by, or who evoke a strong reaction in us, are excellent mirrors for helping us see deeper into ourselves and our disowned qualities.
Expectations
Expectations are another keyword associated with Libra. Expectations can exist in all kinds of relationships, and they are sometimes necessary and healthy. From personal to professional to every-day settings, there are certain expectations of how we interact with each other in a variety of contexts.
However, some expectations can be riddled in unfairness, codependency, or selfishness. Sometimes we need to negotiate and talk about our expectations. Sometimes relationships with unfair expectations require Libra’s diplomacy in order to find balance.
Those with strong Libra or 7th house energy are exploring these themes of projections and expectations in some way. They may be more sensitive to them, they may be unconsciously enacting them, receiving them from others, or all of the above.
People-Pleasing and Dependency
Libra seeks harmony with others, but sometimes at all costs, leading to a shadow aspect of people pleasing. Below the kind and altruistic behavior is a dependency on others for approval, purpose and belonging. It could be easy for Libra to focus too much on other people’s needs, give too much, and bend too far until one day they break.
In a lower expression, Libra might define themselves based on their relationships, and feel lost if they are alone. Therefor, they are dependent on others for their sense of self. This is why Libra— or anyone— would become a people-pleaser: because they don’t want to be abandoned or left alone. As long as they are liked and feel approval and a sense of belonging, they can have feel “secure.”
However, inherent in this dependency and focus on other people’s needs is a covert act of manipulation. Whether they are conscious of it or not, Libra can be using other people for security that they ought to find within themselves. Their caretaking nature may not actually be genuinely altruistic at all, because it gives them a sense of purpose, comfort, and helps them avoid focusing on themselves.
It’s important to note that these themes of dependency and manipulation can manifest in a spectrum of ways. It could be anything from the person who feels like a doormat that is always being stepped on— though they put themselves in that situation time and time again— or the more dominant, bossy personality who might act like they don’t need anyone else, but truthfully they rely on others for praise, followers, and attention.
Whether its a false martyr, raging narcissist, or something more benign in between, the Libra and the 7th house is asking us to cultivate greater awareness of any dependencies or manipulative behavior that we have with other people. Libra desires true relationship, though in lower expressions, it could look more like a “situationship.”
.
“I and Thou” vs. “I and it.”
The idea of “I and Thou” relationships comes from German author Martin Buber, and it has been eloquently used to describe the Libra archetype. “I and Thou” refers to any connection where the other person is treated with the same respect, dignity, and honor that we wish to have for ourselves. Engaging with someone as a “Thou” has an entirely different energy than if we were to engage with them as an “it,” or as if they were an object. It is like the classic aphorism of “treat others the way you want to be treated.”
Those with strong Libra energy may be more sensitive to this theme of "I and Thou” vs. “I and it.” They might have things that they need to learn or experience around this, or may need to learn to see themselves more like a “Thou,” cultivating more self-respect and self-esteem.
Opposite Aries: the Need for Freedom and Independence
The Aries archetype is opposite Libra, therefor it creates a polarity that helps balance out Libra’s energy. The axis that is formed between Aries and Libra has a lot to do with the theme of Self vs. Other.
Aries is more self-focused— concerned with their freedom, independence, personal desires, and self-discovery. Aries shows Libra that it is ok to detach from others and go your own separate way sometimes. Aries can embody a certain level of healthy selfishness— the kind of selfishness that isn’t harming or hurting anyone, it’s just about prioritizing your own needs, wants, and desires with a positive self-esteem.
Libra could be so focused on other people that they risk being codependent, overly compliant, or making too many comprises to the point of losing their own independent identity. Aries can challenge Libra to set themselves free, to break away from toxic compliance. Aries wants Libra to remember that this is your life to live, only you can live it, and in order to do so, you need to take action, use your free will, and make independent choices.
Going a layer deeper, Aries can teach Libra that freedom and independence IS possible while still staying in relationship. A truer, higher expression of love is where both people feel free. Aries can teach Libra how to claim their own freedom, but how to also give freedom back to their partner. Aries reminds Libra to not be controlling of others, cut them some slack, let them be, and see how the relationship could actually become closer when you do so.
Square Cancer: Childhood Wounds in the Relationship
Cancer forms a 90-degree square with Libra, which symbolizes an evolutionary tension between those two archetypes that needs to be resolved. Because Cancer most prominently deals with the childhood, family dynamics, and the early home life, this square with Libra often shows up when relationships trigger childhoods wounds or unresolved family dynamics.
Libra might unconsciously project their unmet childhood needs onto their partners, and expect their partners to act more like parents. They could be drawn to these kinds of people, reenacting familiar scenarios, and receiving a twisted sense of comfort from them. It could also manifest in having immature relationships, or relating in an immature or childish way.
Because Cancer desires safety, emotional wellbeing, nurturance, and tenderness, this square could also highlight relationships that don’t feel safe, or where we don’t feel accepted for being who we are. With these two archetypes, people’s reactions to us could feel highly personal, and elicit and emotional charge from within us.
This square can resolve by addressing any lingering childhood wounds, family issues, or any insecurities around feeling emotionally safe. There is a need to make peace with the past, take responsibility for its emotional imprints, and turn all of that pain into love and care that can make relationships more safe, more tender, and more enriching.
Square Capricorn: Judgmentalism or the Need to Grow Up
Capricorn also forms a 90-degree square to Libra, representing a friction that needs to be resolved. The Capricorn archetype desires to gain authority— whether through climbing the social ladder, achieving mastery in a career, or taking ownership over one’s life. Essentially, Capricorn is like “boss” energy. However in that pursuit of greater authority, Capricorn can become overly judgmental and controlling, using their power to create unnecessary rules and boundaries. This energy of judgmentalism and control can infiltrate relationships in Libra, making an equal partnership impossible, because one partner is always trying to maintain control.
On the other hand, Capricorn’s pursuit toward authority and mastery can make them more serious, grounded, and mature. Sometimes this square could highlight how our relationships or codependent patterning (Libra) hold us back from our life’s work and personal maturation (Capricorn). We may need to do an audit of our relationships and bring greater balance to them (Libra) in order to achieve our purpose in life (Capricorn). Otherwise, the friction of this square will generate negative experiences until we finally make the necessary changes.
The Highest Expression: Objectivity through Listening
One of the lesser known but most essential parts of the Libra archetype has to do with listening. In the highest expression, Libra is concerned with fairness and equality— thereform they must be objective. Libra can only be objective when they truly and deeply listen. To listen is to be receptive— remember that Venus is the ruling planet of Libra.
If we stop to think about it: are we really listening to the people in our lives? Listening with all of our senses. Are we allowing the people around us to tell us who they are and what they need? Are we observing them with the eyes and ears of objectivity, or do we only see and listen to the story we project onto them?
Are we listening to ourselves when we notice a red flag or when someone’s behavior feels off? Are we being objective with ourselves in our own self-reflections?
In the highest expression, Libra is committed to being in healthy relationships as an equal, and in order to do so, they must listen deeply. This art of listening helps Libra to be a diplomat and mediator, and allows them to collaborate with others in order to create greater harmony and balance for all.
Where is the Libra Archetype in Your Chart?
Remember that we all have the Libra archetype somewhere in our charts, not only those with the sun in Libra. Look to your birth chart to see if you have any planets or points in Libra, the 7th house, as well the house and sign of your Venus. To take a deep dive into all things Libra or see how this archetype specifically applies to you, book a birth chart consultation and we can explore in-depth.
